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Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Deadwood and American Idol

From Wikipedia: “The Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything is a concept taken from Douglas Adams's science fiction series The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.”

Okay. I was cool with that for years. I mean, why not? But I have found a better, a truer, a more definitive answer. The real Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything” is the realization that Deadwood’s Al Swearengen and American Idol’s Simon Cowell are the same person.

Simon Cowell = Al Swearengen
They are the heart of things, the Big Man, and while they are hated and despised for their character flaws and insensitivity, they are loved and respected for their honest and because they provide everyone with a living. They hate the powers that be, and have found a way around them, until they ARE them.

Randy Jackson = Dan Dority
They are basically useless people who have success and prestige due to their positions of influence with the the Big Man.

Paula Abdul = Johnny Burns
Morons who are loved and tolerated because, like puppies, they are loving and perky and incapable of betrayal, plus they pee on the carpet by accident only.

Ryan Seacrest = EB Farnum
They are in it for themselves. They think they should be the Big Man, and that fate has cheated them, not due to circumstance, but due to the fact that fate made them weak and insignificant, untalented, compared to the Big Man. Thus they have made mutual agreement with the Big Man, though they despise him and covet his Big Man – ness.

A quick disclaimer… When I say Paula Abdul is a moron, above, I don’t mean Paula Abdul is a moron. I don’t know her and wouldn’t want to guess. But she certainly play “Paula Abdul the moron” on American Idol. And I think that all four of those mentioned above are really playing the caricatures of themselves on that show, at this poing. So there you go. One might ask who Seth Bullock is, or Calamity Jane, or Cy Tolliver… Some people from some other shows, I guess. You tell me.


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