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Friday, March 31, 2006

Shavegeekdom part deux: Blood

So I've been using my Murker HD razor with a Murker blade, and Wal Mart bought boar's hair brush, Williams Mug Shave soap, and King of Shaves pre-shave oil, and KOS Alpha Gel for a week. I mixed a dollop of the KOS gel with the soap for a few days and got a better lather, but I didn't like the smell...

The first shave with the Murker blade resulted in two cuts. After that I got better or the blade became more forgiving, because Saturday through Thursday I had zero cuts.

So I decided to step it up and try a Feather blade. Mostly the shavegeeks fear the feather blade, mostly. (You say it like Newt in Aliens, the "mostly.") But these guys talk about Feathers like gun-control feaks talk about guns- like they are evil and maim of their own volition... I knew the blades couldn't be that bad. Plus I figured I might be a natural.

I was wrong. I was very careful this morning, not only because we're talking about the Feather but because it is a BRAND NEW blade and that leads to cuts. I really took my time. After my NS pass with the grain I was okay. I had three tiny cuts but hey, I had had two with the Murker- I knew those guys exagerrated the danger! After the S/N pass I had one more... No biggie. I went for my T&C (Touch and Feel- you touch to feel the places you missed because you can't see them and then you cut against the grain) and got one more... Okay, so five versus two. Pretty damn sharp blade! I used my styptic pencil, just touch it to the cuts and the bleeding stops instantly.

I walked into the bedroom, got dressed, came out and looked in the mirror, ready to apply some Nivea A/S balm...

I HAD TWELVE BLOODY SPOTS ON MY FACE!!!

The original five were deeper than I had thought and seven more had magically appeared...

WHAT THE F#$(!!!???!!!

Lemme tell you something about these Feather blades man... They're evil. They WANT to cut you... they LOVE to cut you... Don't try it until you are a shavegeek level six, and even then I suggest you take out life insurance first.

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